Monday, December 10, 2007

Deadbeat Bloggers

'Tis the season to be jolly...and to say adios to the delinquent bloggers in my sidebar. As you know, being a Mighty Blog affiliate is a privilege, not a right. And as such, I reserve the right to tell you to FUCK OFF if you refuse to regularly update your blog with high quality material such as that found here on The Mighty Blog. So without further ado, here is the latest round of fuckoffs. Did YOU make the list???

Because Scientists Really Are Funnier Than You Are - This is still an active blog, but dammit, it's too fucking hard to read. The text is too small, and it blends in to the background. Not only that, but the posts overlap into the right sidebar. Messy and not worth the effort.

Blog Portland - All you have to do is click the link to see why this blog is getting the axe. Our old friend McFatty apparently moved on without leaving a forwarding address. This is a big NO-NO per the Mighty Blog Affiliates Code:

  • Section II, Paragraph 3: An affiliate blog may not cease operations without the prior written consent of Mighty Dyckerson or a designated representative of Mighty Dyckerson Enterprises Worldwide.

I Must Be Slipping - Yeah, you're slipping, alright. You haven't updated your fucking blog since SEPTEMBER. Take a hike, loser.

Otaku Photog (AKA "EWink") - This guy is a news videographer. Every day he deals with fires, car wrecks, and mangled bodies. If anybody should have an ample supply of blog fodder, it's him. But does he share any of it with us?? NOOOOO!!! See you in Hell, EWink!!!

Randomness - She posts. She doesn't post. She posts. She doesn't post. I've tried coaching her. I've tried counseling her. I even paid for her boob job. Well I'm through with that bitch!*

Scary Monster - This is a perfect example of what happens when a new blogger takes to the Internets by storm, adding new blog posts several times every day. He set an impossible pace for himself, and eventually he got burned out. It's sad, really. It pains me to have to do this, but Monster, I'm FUCKING YOU OFF.

Surreptitious Psychosis - In her most recent post, Aza promises to update again soon. Well that was back in August. AUGUST, people!!! Well Aza, I'm deleting your blog SOON...and by soon, I mean NOW.

Tiny Voices in My Head - Here's a hot chick who had herself a really nice blog. Interesting content, lots of readers, everything you could ever ask for. But she had to piss it all away to start some girlie rock band and pretend to play guitar. I bet she only knows one chord. Such a shame.

Finally, there are several bloggers on the endangered species list. These blogs are hereby placed on PROBATION until they are updated by their rightful owners:

That's it, you've been warned! If you dipshits don't get your shit together fast, you're going on the chopping block during the next round of fuckoffs! HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!

* Please come back, darling!

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