Sunday, November 18, 2007

Virginia is for Bloggers

And now, a message from Mighty Dyckerson, ambassador and unofficial spokesdyck for the Commonwealth of Virginia Board of Tourism...

Virginia is a state rich in history and natural beauty. Founded in 1776 by Virginius W. Cornholio, it is home to over 10,000 people and nearly 400 species of wildlife*. The economy is thriving**, the crime rate is low***, and the job market is strong****. Bottom line, Virginia is a terrific place to live...especially if you're a certain sassy blonde who is thinking about relocating and raising a family.

There is plenty to see and do in our fair state. You'll find endless beauty from the white sands of Virginia Beach..... the majestic peaks of the Blue Ridge Mountains.

Virginia is also home to historic Jamestown where you can buy postcards with pictures of gay homosexuals and clever captions that say "Visit Jamestown."

Another interesting fact about Virginia: TV's Andy Griffith once took a dump at a rest stop in Manassas while on his way home to North Carolina!

Let's say you're getting on in years and are nearing retirement age. Virginia's assisted living facilities are among the best in the nation!***** And you can die here knowing your body will be buried in some of the most fertile soil on the entire eastern seaboard!******

So what are you waiting for? Come one, come all to Virginia!!!

* These are rough estimates. Emphasis on ROUGH.
** Especially if you're in the illegal narcotics business.
*** If you don't count murders, thefts, and assaults.
**** McDonald's is always hiring.
***** OK, I completely made that one up.
****** Granted that's not saying much.

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