Bloggers in the News

I am pleased to announce the lovely Randomness, subject of the literary masterpiece Ode to Randomness, has been reinstated as a Mighty Blog affiliate! This comes after a six month absence during which time I impregnated her with my pork rind dick, causing her to give birth to a dead pig. Well done Randomness!

********************

To make room for Randomness' return, I'm giving the ax to deadbeat blogger Lux Lisbon and her never-updated I'm Not Defensive. I'm also tempted to pull the plug on Malnurtured Snay. He/she/it is still an active blogger, but he/she/it never shows up around here anymore. I'll give him/her/it a break this once, but next time, he/she/it may not be so lucky. Snay, consider yourself warned!

********************

Meanwhile, Lambo is at it again. She is begging me to add her ovine blog to my exclusive list of affiliates. Frankly, I'm just not comfortable doing this. Lambo's G-rated blog is severely lacking in references to flatulence, bowel movements, blowjobs, porn, and poon. But I hate to be the one to disappoint the little ball of lint, so I'm putting it to a vote! You'll find a special Mighty Blog poll just below the Chat Hole in the sidebar.*

********************

And finally, my third wife ADW threatened to slit her own wrists if I don't answer the following five questions. I hate to see good POON go to waste, so here you go:

1. You have control of the world's oil reserves. What do you do next? I get myself a chainsaw, a Nubian goat, and a bottle of Henessee. I utilize the chainsaw to cut down some redwoods and build a fort to protect my oil reserves. The Nubian goat will stand guard outside the gate, and if anybody tries to hurt him, I will bash in their skulls with the Henessee bottle.

2. Me and my girlfriends are out drinking and we run into you. What happens? I will impregnate all of you with my 35-year-old pork rind dick.

3. You have a chainsaw, a Nubian Goat and a bottle of Henessee. What do you do with them? See #1.

4. If a woodchuck could chuck wood, how much wood could a woodchuck chuck? A woodchuck can't chuck wood, so fuck that woodchuck with a hockey puck and make that schmuck suck a lucky duck.

5. What is your penis called and do you have names for your testicles? My penis is Sir Squirtsalot. My testicles are named Manny, Moe, and Jack.



* Mighty Dyckerson reserves the right to alter poll results to his liking.